Paperwork is for Winners

After a short break mostly spent sticking my head in a pillow and screaming, I'm back.
All of last week could be described in the following manner:

Moronic Co-workers:
"We're going to hop, skip and jump into the office ready to catch up on all the work we neglected to do last week while we acted out our hidden tiger fantasies. Having secured a dubious victory in what basically amounted to the saddest display of the loss of our youth and our souls, we will walk about as if we've just won the World Cup. Thrice. While blindfolded and jumping on only one leg.

As a result we'll be elated at the prospect of long hours, no overtime and very little sleep for the next week.

Our overbearing sense of team spirit will not, however, be enough to actually get us to work more efficiently. But it will ensure that we go about every single activity with the maximum amount of !!!ENTHUSIASM!!! possible. Be it stapling printouts or rehearsing, practicing and executing a victory dance in one of our conference rooms."*

Jamal Bhai:
"Having displayed leadership skills and athletic ability on the football field, for my encore I will watch twice as many stupidvideos at double the volume. Since I am in higher spirits my laughter will be louder and more booming, at a special frequency that threatens to destroy Pintu's hearing and sanity."

Raju Bhai:
"I walk the earth as a sort of warrior priest with the spirit of a tiger. When I walk I leave footprints of fire. I am happy to be what I believe was the main drive behind our recent football glory, despite scoring no goals and almost causing serious mob violence. I am also happy to talk to you about my pivotal role in the game, whether you want me to or not.

Belal:
I now truly believe I am a tiger. When I greet people I ROAR a little. Of course it catches on really fast and before you know it, the office is filled with little moments met by someone going "RRRROOOOAAR!" and everyone else "roaring" in laughter.


Oh,
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHA
HA
HA
HA



Pintu:
"Worst, in a particularly worst way."


* yes, this really happened.